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Advice for new swingers

Swinging for beginners!

Whatever your own personal reasons for wanting to become a swinger, if you are part of a couple (married or not) you should not even consider taking another step until you have talked it through with them and you BOTH agree it is something you definitely want to try!

Many people have fantasies about having sex with strangers, threesomes or even taking part in an orgy but making that fantasy a reality can be a different mattter all together.

Just because you and your partner have shared fantasy stories about involving others in sex scenarios it doesn't necessarily mean that they want to try this, for many the thought is stimulation enough. Unless you have openly discussed swinging or dogging you really shouldn't try and force it upon them. There are many factors to think of first, such as:

  • Jealousy - this can be the single biggest problem for couples no matter how much they both were up for the idea of being swingers. Before you even start finding contacts really spend some time trying to imagine your partner being intimate with someone else
  • Relationship - swinging will not help a failing relationship/marriage, the vast majority of swinging couples are in very secure, strong happy relationships. Neither is swinging an excuse for an affair!
  • Type - by this we mean what type of swingers are you looking for and are going to class yourselves as? Are you looking for a threesome (MMF or MFM) do you want to soft swap with another couple or do you want full swap and are you looking for bisexual encounters? You need to have this straight in your own minds before you can start contacting other swingers.
  • Advert - this is basically how you make contact with other swingers, you create your own profile describing yourselves, your likes/turn-ons, who you want to make contact with, etc. Take time out to read other sex personals first - most decent contacts sites will let you see the text versions of profiles/ads for free so you can see who is already a member of the site before you join and pay for services.
  • Chat - use the online facilities on the contact sites to talk to other more experienced swingers to find out what it is really like, what happens on first "dates" and what will be expected of you.
  • Be prepared - if you decide to go ahead and meet the contacts you make online make sure you both agree on how far you are going to take things and remember that you are a couple and if one is in any way uncomfortable with how things are going the other one should not forget them and carry on regardless - you still have to live with each other after that one night of passion!
 
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